So, life is still pretty boring .... lol but I suppose when isn't it... I am just sitting here, thought I would pop in and say that I am going to be writing tonight... thinking about sharing some poetry on here... nothing special or fancy just some things I had jingling in my head .... lol...

When isn't something jingling in my head... which reaminds me Lee has stopped talking to me... maybe my life is not doomed to death like I thought lol... though I suppose I could text him and see how his move is going... that would be the right thing to do huh... lol... Ok I texted lol... besided I will always love Lee Evan... he is a doll...

Lets see what else is rolling around in this stupid head... hmmm oh yeah what is up with that new video from Ken$ha... Blow... lol that I can not get out of my head for some reason... "Ken $ sigh Ha" lol to dang funny... where does she get this stuff... I thought my head was a mess... lol but kuddos to her it is a pretty catchy tune and I am stuck on it somehow...

I do yes still miss that Bach person from my chatroom... lol which I suppose I know is stupid but hell who cares ... I never claimed to be smart right... lol ... now that moves me on to Rich... who is another chatroom friend I am kinda missing a lot lately too... now see here is where I am totally going insane cause like I mean he just vanished... poof into thin air and without a word or anything yet ... I know he is still around I feel him... which I know sucks so bad but I know he is around... I just don't know where... and I don't know why he stopped talking to me and I think I am going to get down to the bottom of that whole thing... cause I was told that I should for sure not talk to him and that he was hiding things from me... but now I wonder what and why? which I don't get at all ... hmmmmm though I am wondering do I get it ... see stupid brain and a million things going through it...

So my solution for this issue of the mind... drink.. I think I am going to drink tonight... hell why not? and besides ... noone is here and I won't have anyone to talk to for awhile so I think it sounds very logical to me... besides that is what all us lonley people do... okay well most of us... lol ok well some of us... okay well atleast me... sometimes...

Now see here is the thing about falling in love... why the hell does it even happen... I mean love is so many different things right but it seems to me it always ends up hurting and bad and not what you dream it can be... and everyone says well it takes two ... yes it does and that is the issue it seems like in every relationship one person is more in love then the other.. and then it goes south... so what does that really mean? I guess there is one person in the relationship that is not trying as hard as the other... do you all think?

I don't know I suppose this is all random crap spewing from a insane freak but it is all jingling around in my head and I can not help it... that is why I have this diary... to be able to write the random crap out... writing is a very good release for all the anger, hurt, confusion, and even for love... I don't know thank Mr Nance ... my 9th grade english teacher... he was my whole reason for even being so random in my writing... lol... I wonder what he is up to now adays... lol... and I hope he inspired many more young people to love writing as much as he did me...

Other then that what is there to say.. I am rolling out to the store, getting drunk, sitting around in my chatroom, acting insane (I hope I don't get booted) and then I am going to think on things really really hard... cause I know I am missing something... I am smarter then the average bear ya know :P hehehe... Ok so maybe you don't but I don't like to act smart that is way to boring... that is why I love my geek... hehehe cause he can be smart enough for the both of us... lol...

BBL... not that you really want me too lol hahahaha